I have been frozen, unable to live my own life, ever since the 7th of October happened in my homeland.
Not allowing myself to fully embrace and enjoy life in my beautiful retreat place in Costa Rica.
Feeling for my family, friends, and community living under war. In Gaza, Beit Lahem, Nablus, Hebron, Jerusalem, Jaffa, Ramele, Tel Aviv, Nazareth, or Haifa.
Feeling ashamed that I get to live life in nature, enjoying the spaciousness. The peace, the lusciousness of the gardens, the waterfalls, the ocean.
Feeling guilty about the safety and security I have. The peace and freedom that is available to me here and now when it isn’t for so many people in my homeland. and protected by the unconditional love of my family here, my husband and two boys.
I thought I had to do something, to contribute in some way, shape, or form, to what was going on.
How can I enjoy all this when so many of my original family, friends, and community are dying? so many are feeling helpless, hopeless, and with no peace in sight?
The calls for a ceasefire are unanswered.
The calls for international protection are ignored.
The entire scene on social media is a battlefield for right and wrong. For which narrative gets the most likes and comments. Which narrative is justified. Which people get to live their lives in safety, security, and freedom.
On October 27th, I launched Peace Activation. I found the action that made sense to me to move out of the freeze, fight and flight.
I invited anyone, including palestinians , israelis and other nationalities, to share safe space beyond the narratives.
To meet in the field of Rumi, beyond wrongdoing and rightdoing.
In our weekly gatherings we share safe space between polarized views.
We express our feelings and find a sense of inner peace to continue life on its own terms.
We embrace our heplesness without feeling imprisoned in the collective trauma and resignation.
We find our way to collectively embrace the different narratives of those present.
I also launched a weekly gatuering for Palestinians. I seeked to connect, to belong to my community. whereas most of my life I longed more to embrace the international, world citizen life. The crisis brought my ethnic, religious, and national identity to the forefront. And how I can embrace it along with all the other identities I have developed throughout my journey in life.
In parallel I facilitated and participated in gatherings for Israelis. I seeked to listen, to hold and share a non-threathening space. To go deeper into the existential trauma and beyond the intergenerational trauma. I encouraged open dialogue about the impact of historical events on individual and collective psyche within the Israeli community.
On a professional level, with another friend and colleague, I initiated a a gathering for peacebuilding organizations. Our aim was to create a safe space for those feeling frozen by the inaction and the unwillingness to choose a side. Is there a way out of this collective crisis? is there a vision that we can hold together? Can we choose peace for humanity, without dropping our own identity? Can we make space for Palestinians’ narrative, ignored and denied for the past century? Do we need to compare or add it to a Jewish Israeli narrative? a narrative of victimhood and justification for a Jewish state to protect? To protect from antisemitism, rampant now and is riding the wave of the Palestinian cause.
Through all these gatherings, I hoped to foster understanding and empathy, and ultimately contribute to the process of healing and reconciliation. What struck me most in all these calls and gatherings is how our identities are being restricted. How our hearts are contracting. How the legitimity of our humanity is being questioned. How our being isn’t allowed to be.
In our last meeting I referred to the multiplicity of identities that we need to embrace. I shared that we need to allow the elasticity of our being to carry us forward in these times of despair.
It occurred to me then that I needed to dive deeper into it. Explain what exactly I mean by these two terms and how individuals can practice them.
The concept of Multiplicity of identities refers to the different aspects of identity. Aspects such as race, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, religion, and more. This concept challenges the traditional notion of a singular, fixed identity. It recognizes the complexity and diversity of human experiences.
Many people are feeling many identities in tension. I felt that at the beginning of this crisis. Noticing how my “Palestinianhood”, triggered some deep relationships I had with Israelis. As if stating I am Palestinian meant I am for the violence instigated by Hamas. Or that I am against the existence of the Jewish people.
Thanks to the deep love and respect I have with these friends, we were able to process that together . Clarify what identity meant inside for each of us. What each of these identities represented. How we can embrace one of our identities without dropping the other. How can the other feel heard, seen or loved while hearing, seeing and loving opposing views?
The multiplicity of identities recognize that each person's identity is unique and multifaceted. My sense of self is composed of the multiplicity of all my identities. It is important to acknowledge and respect the intersectionality of these identities. They intersect and interact in complex ways to shape my experiences and perspectives.
The multiplicity of identities also highlights the fluidity of identity. I have experienced so many changes in my identity over time. I felt more connected to certain aspects of my identity in different contexts. When I lost my eyesight for two years, a whole range of my social identities dropped and took a back seat.
This fluidity challenges the idea that identity is static and unchanging. It encourages us to embrace the complexity and evolution of our identities.
Accepting the multiplicity of identities is crucial for promoting inclusivity and diversity. Celebrating the diversity of identities within communities enable us to create safe spaces.
Spaces that are welcoming and affirming for all individuals.
Spaces of undestanding and empathy. Appreciating the unique experiences and perspectives that each person brings to the table.
It is important to recognize the impact of societal structures and power dynamics.
They influence the way individuals experience their multiple identities.
Systems of oppression, discrimination, and privilege.
They all intersect with and affect different aspects of a person's identity. in their unique ways. Understanding these dynamics is crucial for addressing social inequalities.
Hence the interaction between the multiplicity of identities and the elasticity of being.
The concept of "elasticity of being" refers to the ability of individuals to adapt. Ability to bounce back from challenging situations. Capacity to remain flexible in the face of adversity. Resiient in the face of change, and uncertainty. This concept is often associated with mental and emotional strength. As well as the ability to maintain a sense of balance and well-being despite the ups and downs of life.
Individuals with multiple identities are more adaptable and flexible. both in their behavior and attitudes. This elasticity of being allows them to navigate various social contexts. it allow them to adapt to different cultural norms. this lead to a more open-minded and inclusive worldview. Embracing the multiplicity of identities leads to a more fluid and dynamic sense of self. Allowing individuals to explore different aspects of their identity and express themselves authentically. It took me time to allow and accept my seemingly paradoxical multiple identities. but once I did , I was able to connect to a more elastic and resilient sense of being.
One of the key components of elasticity of being is the ability to cultivate a growth mindset. This involves viewing challenges as opportunities for learning and personal development. Chalenges are not insurmountable obstacles. In my trainings and coaching I refer to the chinese definition of crisis. A crisis in Chinese is composed of two words, Wei - Ji, Wei is danger and Ji is opportunity. In the face of a crisis, we contract as we see the danger, and we expand, as we open to the opportunities it also brings.
I have been working in the field of conflict transformation for 25 years. What I noticed as a coach is that Individuals with a growth mindset are more likely to embrace change. they are more likely to take risks, and persevere in the face of setbacks. They are also more open to seeking support and feedback from others. They understand that growth and resilience are often fostered through collaboration and connection.
Another important aspect of the elasticity of being is emotional intelligence. This involves the ability to recognize and understand one's own emotions. As well as the emotions of others. Individuals with high emotional intelligence are better equipped to manage stress. They navigate interpersonal relationships, and make sound decisions. They are also more adept at regulating their emotions. this allow them to maintain a sense of equilibrium during challenging times.
Physical health and well-being are integral to the concept of elasticity of being. Engaging in regular exercise. Consuming a balanced diet. Getting an adequate amount of sleep. These are all part of the maintenance fo our physical resilience.
I had hard time to adopt a discipline of regular and consistent exercises until I met my husband. (lucky to marry a guy who is also a health and well being coach!) For most of my life my work‘s deadlines (emphasis on the “dead”) and mental focus would often take over my physical wellness.
But I discovered that when I put my physical exercises as a priority I am able to be even more productive. Additionally practicing mindfulness and relaxation helped me manage my ongoing stress. It allowed me to cultivate a sense of inner calm, which has been crucial in regaining my eyesight.
Cultivating the elasticity of being is a lifelong journey that requires self commitment. Ongoing commitment for self-reflection, self-care, and personal growth. It involves developing a strong sense of self-awareness. As well as the ability to adapt to changing circumstances and bounce back from adversity.
We all have a role to play.
We each have a piece for peace.
We can foster a growth mindset. We can nurture our emotional intelligence. We can prioritize our physical well-being. This enhances our resilience and capacity to thrive in the face of life's challenges.
Ultimately, the elasticity of being is about embracing change. Building inner strength, and living with a sense of purpose and vitality. I deeply believe that cultivating inner peace will bring us to world peace.
This is what Peace Activation and soul based peacebuilding is all about. It challenges us to rethink the traditional understanding of identity.
Embrace the complexity and diversity of all human experiences.
And be Loyal to our Soul.
Recognize and celebrate the unique and intersecting aspects of each person's identity.
Together we can work towards creating more inclusive and equitable communities for all. Not only in Palestine/Israel but in the whole world.
What we’re hoping to cultivate in these meetings is resilience amid hardship. To move away from the freeze, fight or flight and connect to the elasticity of our being. That is what will restore our sovereignty.This is one of the keys.
You can register for our weekly calls here www.peaceactivation.org
In peace